He looks just like......

YOU!  That is not a typo y'all..... Let me tell you the story.

Does he look like me???

I had a last minute opportunity to visit Virginia, but more importantly visit one of my dearest friends over Valentine's Day weekend.  (YES, my husband and I chose to do Valentine's day apart..GASP! Sidenote #1: my daughters had one of the best Valentine's with daddy). Anyway, there was no way just a mere 5 months into our new family of 5 that daddy was going to man the fort with all 3 kiddos for 5 days (Let it be know, mommy wouldn't have either).  It was about $400 worth of clarity to know which kids were staying home as Josiah still flies FREE (Sidenote #2: Airlines are smart to make it under 2 flies free....2 may be stretching it because the airplane was not so much for my mobile son!).

So the trip to VA was pretty much awesome if we weren't on an airplane.  Great food, company, and guilty pleasure of Impractical Jokesters (Sidenote #3: watch it! So funny but not a family friendly option).  Moving right along to stepping off the last airplane of the trip in Austin, TX. Incredibly exhausted from little sleep and standing for 90 minutes (thanks to a middle seat between two business men...thank you Delta!), the flight attendant at the door says, "He looks just like you!"

My response, "Thank you! Have a great day!" Now, my son is pretty dang handsome so I'm not insulted but I don't think he looks like a girl either :) But this did leave me with some interesting thoughts.

1. I am often sensitive/paranoid to what our new family looks like to other people. As I have pondered this more, it was actually refreshing (and very comical) that others saw Josiah as my son.  The last 5 months have been "SEE PREVIOUS POST"and so this moment has helped me see that we are forming as a family.
2. I don't have to explain my family to everyone. I love being an advocate for adoption and our family is a testimony to such.  But not everyone all the time needs the full story.  Through adoption training, we are encouraged to be cautious with what we do share about our children's stories but it is certainly a balancing act and this was a moment for me to let it be.  Yup, he is my son.
3.  And now the zinger: How much do I say as a person to fill space/ease tension/break silence? I'm reading and listening to a sermon series in James.  ...But no human being can tame the tongue.  It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison (James 3:8). This flight attendant was truly sincere and sweet; no evil intent.  But I do know the truth that Josiah doesn't have any of my genetics to look like me so as I have thought about it the last few weeks, I keep thinking about things I might say because my tongue is restless.  Definition of restless: Unable to rest or relax as a result of anxiety or boredom.  As a woman (yes, even me...haha if you know me well), we are flippant with our tongue.  Prayer requests can quickly turn to gossip and I don't stop it.  I can actually pick a fight with my husband just because I can't be quiet! I don't like quiet so I know I often fill the space from boredom.  Or when trying to comfort a friend I HAVE to say something instead of being silent and listening. This is still being flushed out in my head and heart with actual application, but I can tell God is speaking to me about it  And it might just be best to zip it and listen.
4.  Lastly, people must think I have a very handsome black husband :)